Disclaimer
This book is transliteration of Umera Ahmed’s masterpiece Peer-e-Kaamil WITHOUT HER PERMISSION.
This is only for those readers who understand Urdu but can’t read it. On Goodreads, some people asked meabout Roman transliteration of Peer-e-Kamil. I couldn’t find it, so I made a mental note to try and make it available to others for free when I get time. Then I forgot about it because I never get time.
And this morning, I got this book. Some kind soul had enough time to transliterate, print, and spiral bind and bring it home.
Anyone interested in reading the roman version can borrow from me.
And those online can read it here.
P.S. This is NOT English translation. If you want that, it’s available on Amazon.
“Mujhe pehle hi andaza tha ke tum apne apartment par hi hoge, sirf tum ne jaan boojh kar answer phone laga diya hoga.”
Saad agley din 10 baje Salar ke apartment par maujood tha. Salar ne neend mein uth kar darwaza khola taha.
“Tum is tarah baghair bataye bhaag kyun aaye mere apartment se.” Saad ne andar aate hue jhaada.
“Bhaaga to nahin, tum so rahe the, main ne tumhein jagaana munaasib nahin samjha.” Salar ne aankhein masalatey hue kaha.
“Kis waqt aaye the tum?”
“Shayad 4-5 baje.”
“Ye jaane ka kaun sa waqt tha?” Saad ne tunak kar kaha.
“Aur tum is tarah aaye kyun?” Salar kuch kehne ki bajaye living rook e sofe par jaa kar aundhey munh let gaya.
“Shayad meri baton se tum naraaz ho gaye the, main isi liye excuse karne aaya hoon.” Saad ne dusre sofe par baithte hue kaha.
“Kaun si baaton se?” Salar ne gardan ko halka sa tirchha karte hue usi tarah lete Saad se pucha.
“Wahi sab kuch jo main ne kuch ghussey mein aa kar raat ko tum se keh diya.” Saad ne maazrat khwaahaana andaaz mein kaha.
“Nahin, main aisi choti choti baton par to naraaz nahin ho sakta. Tum ne aisi koi baat nahin ki jis par tumhein excuse karne ke liya yahan aana padta.” Salar ne usi ke andaaz mein kaha.
“Phir tum is tarah achaanak mere apartment se kyun aa gaye?” Saad bazid hua.
“Bas mera dil ghabraaya aur main yahan aa gaya aur choon ke sona chahta tha isliye answer phone laga diya.” Salar ne pur sukoon andaaz mein kaha.
“Phir bhi main ye mehsoos kar raha tha ke mujhe tum se is tarah se baat nahin karni chahiye thi. Main subah se bahot pachhta raha hoon.”
“Jaane do use.” Usne usi tarah chehra sofe par chupaaye kaha.
“Salar! Tumhare saath aaj kal kya problem hai?”
“Kuch nahin.”
“Nahin, kuch na kuch to hai. Kuch ajeeb se hote jaa rahe ho tum.”
Is baar Salar ek dam karwat badaltey hue seedha ho gaya. Chit lete Saad ki taraf dekhte hue usne pucha.
“Maslan kaun si baat ajeeb si hoti jaa rahi hai mujhe mein?”
“Bahot saari hain, tum bahot chup chup rehne lage ho, choti choti baton par ulajhne lage ho. Ibaad mujhe bata raha tha ke university jaana bhi chhoda hua hai tum ne aur sab se badi baat ke mazhab mein dilchaspi le rahe ho.” Uske aakhri jumley se Salar ke maathey par teewriyaan aa gayin.
“Mazhab mein dilchaspi? Ye tumhein ghalat fehmi hai. Main mazhab mein dilchaspi lene ki koshish nahin kar raha, main sirf sukoon haasil karne ki koshish kar raha hoon kyun ke main bahot depress hoon. Mujhe zindagi mein kabhi is tarah ka……….. aur is had tak depression nahin hua jis ka shikaar main aaj kal hoon aur main sirf is depression se nijaat haasil karne ke liye raat namaaz padhne ke liye gaya tha.” Usne bahot turshi se kaha.
“Depression kyun hai tumhein?” Saad ne pucha.
“Aar ye mujhe pata hota to mujhe yaqeenan depression na hota. Main ab tak iska kuch na kuch kar chuka hota.”
“Phirb hi koi na koi wajah to hogi, yun baithe bithaaye depression to nahin ho jaata.” Saad ne tabsara kiya.
Salar jaanta tha, wo theek keh raha hai, magar use wajah bata kar khud par hansney ka mauqa faraaham nahin karna chahta tha.
“Kisi dusre ke barey mein to mujhe pata nahin, magar mujhe to baithe bithaaye hi ho jaata hai.” Salar ne kaha.
“Tum koi anti depressant le lete.” Saad ne kaha.
“Main unka dher kha chuka hoon, mujhe koi farq nahin pada.”
“Tum koi kisi psychiatrist se mil lete.”
“Main ye kaam to kabhi nahin karunga, main tang aa chuka hoon un logon se milte milte. Kam az kam ab to main nahin milonga.” Salar ne be ikhteyaar kaha.
“Pehle kis silisley mein milte rahe ho tum?” Saad ne kuch chaunk kar tajassus ke aalam mein pucha. “Bahot is baatein thin, tum unhein rehne de.” Wo ab chit leta chhat ko ghoor raha tha.
“To phir tum aisa kiya karo ke Ibaadat kiya karo, namaaz padha karo.”
“Main ne koshish ki thi magar main namaaz nahin padh sakta na to mujhe waha koi sukoon mila na hi main ye jaanta tha ke main jo padh raha hoon wo kya hai, kyun padh raha hoon.”
“To tum ye jaanne ki koshish karo ke………..”
Salar ne uski baat kaat di. “Ab phir raat wali bahes shuru ho jayegi, siraat-e-mustaqeem wali aur phir tumhein ghussa aayega.”
“Nahin, mujhe ghussa nahin aayega.” Saad ne kaha.
“Jab mujhe ye hi nahin pata ke siraat-e-mustaqeem kya hai to main namaaz kaise padh sakta hoon.”
“Tum namaaz padhna shuru karoge to tumhein khud hi pata chal jayega ke siraat-e-mustaqeem kya hai.”
“Kaise?”
“Tum khud hi ghalat kaamon se bachne lagoge, ache kaam karne lagoge.” Saad ne wazaahat ki koshish ki.
“Magar main koi ghalat kaam nahin karta aur na hi mujhe ache kaam karne ki khwaahish hai. Meri zindagi normal hai.”
“Tumhein ye ehsaas ho bhi nahin sakta ke tumhara kaun sa kaam saheeh hai aur kaun sa ghalat. Jab tak ke………..” Salar ne uski baat kaat di.
“Saheeh aur ghalat kaam mera mas’ala nahin hai………. Abhi to mujhe bas be sukooni rehti hai aur iska talluq mere kaamon se nahin hai.”
“Tum wo tamaam kaam karte ho jo insaan ki zindagi ko be sukoon kar dete hain”
“Maslan.” Salar ne chubhtey hue lehje mein kaha.
“Tum pork khate ho.”
“Come on!” wo be ikhteyaar bilbilaaya. “Pork yahan kahan aa gaya, tum mujhe ek baat batao.” Salar uth kar baith gaya. “Tum to badi baa qaaidgi se namaaz padhte ho, badi Ibaadat karte ho, namaaz ne tumhari zindagi mein kaun si tabdeeliyan kar din?”
“Mujhe be sukooni nahin hai.”
“Haalan ke tumhare formula ke mutaabiq tumhein bhi be sukooni honi chahiye, kyun ke tum bhi bahot se ghalat kaam karte ho.” Salar ne turki ba turki jawaab diya.
“Maslan…… Main kya ghalat kaam karta hoon?”
“Tum jaante ho, mere dohraane ki zaroorat nahin hai.”
“Main……..Main nahin jaanta, tum dohrao.” Saad ne jaise use challenge kiya.
Salar use kuch der dekhta raha phir usne kaha. “Main nahin samajhta Saad ke sirf Ibaadat karne se zindagi mein koi bahot si numaayaan tabdeeli layi jaa sakti hai, ache kaamon ya kirdaar ka talluq Ibaadat karne ya na karne se nahin hota.”
Saad ne uski baat kaar di. “Main isi liye tum se kehta hoon ke apne mazhab mein kuch dilchaspi lo aur Islam ke barey mein kuch ilm haasil karo taa ke apni is ghalat qism ki philosophy aur soch ko badal sako.”
“Meri soch ghalat nahin hai, main ne mazhabi logon se zyada chota, munafiq aur dhokey baaz kisi ko nahin paaya. Main ummeed karta hoon tum bura nahin maanoge magar main sach keh raha hoon. Abhi tak mujhe teen aise logon se waasta pada jo bahot musalmaan bante hain aur Islam ki baat karte hain aur teenon fake hain.” Wo badi talkhi se keh raha tha.
“Sab se pehle main ek ladki se mila, wo badi mazhabi banti thi, parda karti thi, badi paarsaa aur paakbaaz hone ka drama karti thi aur saath mein ek ladke ke saath affair chala rahi thi, apne mangetar ke hote hue uske liye ghar se bhaag gayi. Use zaroorat padi to us ne ek aise shakhs ki bhi madad li jise wo bura samajhti thi yaani use apne faaydey ke liye istemaal karne mein koi aar nahin samjha, un Mohtarma paarsaa khaatun ne.” Uske labon par istehzaaiya muskurahat thi.
“Uske baad main ek aur aadmi se mil ajis ne daadhi rakhi hui thi. Bada pakka aur sachcha qism ka musalmaan tha wo bhi. Laikin us ladki ki madad nahin ki, jis ne usse bheek maangney ki had tak madad maangi thi. Usne us ladki se shadi nahin ki jise wo mohabbat ke naam par bewaqoof banata raha aur abhi kuch arsa pehle main yahan America mein usse mila to uski daadhi bhi ghayab ho chuki thi, shayad uske Islam ke sath.”
Wo hansa. “Aur teesrey tum ho…….. tum pork nahin khate sirf ye ek haraam kaam hai jo tum nahin karte, baaqi sab tumhare liye jayez hai. Jhoot bolna, sharaab peena, zina karna, club mein jana…….. gheebat karna, dusron ka mazaaq udaana, halaan ke waise tum bade nek ho, tum ne daadhi rakhi hui hai, tum hamara dimaagh kha jaate ho Islam ki baatein kar kar ke. Zabardasti namaaz padhane par tuley rehte ho, har baat mein mazhab ka hawala le aate ho. Ye Aayat aur wo hadees……… Wo aayat aur ye hades……… Uske alawa tumhari zubaan par aur kuch hota hi nahin aur jab main tumhara amal dekhta hoon to main zarra barabar bhi tum se muta’assir nahin hota. Kitna mushkil hota hai Islam ke barey mein tumhara lecture sunna, main tumhein bata nahin sakta. Mujh mein aur tum mein zyada farq to nahin hai. Tum daadhi rakh kar aur Islam ki baat kar kar ke wo saare kaam karte ho jo main daadhi ke aur Islam ki baat kiye baghair karta hoon. Ibaadat ne kya inqelaab barpa kiya hai tumhari zindagi mein, siwaaye iske ke tumhein ek khus fehmi ho gayi hai ke tum to seedhe Jannat mein jaaoge aur ham saare dauzakh mein. Tumhare qaul aur fel mein agar ye tazaad na ho to main kabhi tum se ye sab na kehta magar main request karta hoon ke tum dusron ko mazhab ki taraf raaghib karne ki koshish na kiya karo, kyun ke main samajhta hoon ke tum khud bhi mazhab ke saheeh mafhoom se waqif nahin ho. Ab meri in saari baaton ko mind mat karna.”
Salar ab table par pada ek cigarette sulgaa raha tha. Saad taqreeban goonga ho gaya tha.
“Theek hai mujh se kuch ghaltiyan ho jaati hain, magar Allah insaan ko maaf kar deta hai aur main ne kabhi ye to nahin kaha ke main bahot acha musalmaan hoon aur main zaroor Jannat mein jaunga laikin main agar ek acha kaam karta hoon aur dusron ko iski hidaayat karta hoon to ye Allah ki taraf se mujh par farz hai.”
Saad ne kuch er khamoosh rehne ke baad usse kaha.
“Saad! Tum khwaahmakhwaah dusron ki zimme daari apne sar par mat lo. Pehle apne aap ko theek karo, phir dusron ko theek karne ki koshish karo taa ke tumhein koi munafiq naa keh sake aur jahan tak Allah ke maaf kar dene ka talluq hai to agar tumhara khayal hai ke wo tumhari ghaltiyon ko maaf kar sakta hai to phir wo hamein bhi maaf kar sakta hai hamare gunaahon ke liye . Agar tum ye samajhte ho ke logon ko Islam ki taraf raaghib karne se tumhari nekiyon me izaafa hoga aur tum apne gunaahon samet Allah ke qareeb ho jaoge to aisa nahin hoga. Behtar hai tum apna track record theek karo, sirf apne aap ko dekho, dusron ko nek banana ki koshish na karo, hamein bura hi rehne do.”
Us ne turshi se kaha. Us lamhey uske dil mein jo aaya usne Saad se keh diya. Jab wo khamoosh hua to Saad uth kar chala gaya.
Us din ke baad usn dobara kabhi Salar ke saamne Islam ki baat nahin ki.
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https://theothermeunfolded.com/blog/peer-e-kaamil-roman-urdu-umera-ahmed-episode-100/
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~~~
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Shabana Mukhtar