TGIF!
Allah knows, I couldn’t draw to save my position in class. I usually scored 18-20 out of 50, even though I felt it was unfair. I wasn’t THAT bad but I knew I wasn’t an expert. I could never draw a line the way I intended. The best I did was in class 9, to draw a boy playing football. I had practiced it three or four times and according to me, I had perfected it.
The exam day came. The invigilation was on our class teacher Zaheda ma’am. I finished my drawing and submitted it, before time, because that’s what I always did-finish exam before time. I kinda imagined she’d be proud of me. I mean, she knew me to be the girl who knew exactly where each country is, who could solve a map question in the hand-drawn map because she hadn’t brought one from home. I handed over my paper, and came back to my desk-we weren’t allowed to leave until the exam time was over.
I watched ma’am checking out the drawing. For minutes. And then she called me. I stood up, almost pompously, and walked, with a swag.
“The hands of this boy aren’t equal in thickness, and the angle of his foot should have been slightly different, and…”
Just like that, she listed mistakes in my presumably-perfect drawing. Just like that, she crushed all hopes that I had impressed her.
I still can’t draw to save my life.
However, in Dr Bahu, a couple of episodes back, Mina was drawing, and Saniya walked in
Saniya: Does it really help?
Mina: More than you think it does.
And… I had an idea.
I have heard people talk about colouring books for adults, and how therapeutic it is. I had never given in to the temptation but this time, I did.
First, this Sunday, my nephew brought his drawing kit, as he usually does. I always ignore him, except on occasions he brings his drawings for approval. This week, however, I noticed he had a similar colour pencil set as that of Mina, so sat down with my own drawing book (which was purchased in a similar moment of weakness). I drew. And I drew some more. The first thought in my head after looking at the finished drawing was:
Boy, I’m not good at this.
If you looked at it, you’d be like:
There’s no way an adult drew this bad.
To be honest, my nephew helped with some clouds because by then, I was so exhausted.
But the outcome of the exercise did NOT deter me from ordering two sets of colouring pencils: One set of 24 colour pencils, and one set of rainbow pencils.
The rainbow pencils arrived today. Armed with new tools, I felt I’d be better at drawing today. I sat down to first look for inspirations. I found this.
After half an hour of effort, this is what I got.
Don’t even compare. I missed on scale, and skill, both.
The important conclusion is this whole exercise, in general, and just those random strokes on paper, in particular, really is therapeutic, and I’m not giving up on these pencils. Or drawing, for that matter.
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Shabana Mukhtar